F.R.I.E.N.D.S

sometimes i feel envy with a little sadness between..
when i saw pictures of my friends..
smiling happily..with groups of friends..

i wish i could be..
v her, perhaps..
i could spent up to an hour just keep looking at her pics,and
those she v her friends..
i like her?
Haha.......
she is just that pretty that i wish to be as her one day..
orelse..maybe....
looking at her pics..
my mind fell much further behind at the past..
my eyes was wet everytime i did that silly things..

counting the pictures that we captured together..
it could be count with fingers..
perhaps, it was lesser than that..
i cant even get to find any at her profile..
a little dissapointment..perhaps..

watching them close, very close to each other..
i smiled, but i cried in heart..
Hv we ever as close as this?
nope, perhaps..
Hv our friendship can be considered as 'past' now?
Haha!
how long actually can a relationship lasts?
i was confusing and lost now..

sometimes...
i regret for going far from my country..
i regret for my determination in taking this course..
i regret...

Because..i lost..the relationship that i wanna, i wish to hold it so tight..
but....
is feeling that....the relationship is drifting apart..
it had drifted far far away from me..

the feeling was so strong..
it strikes me so hard, the while i was flipping through those old messages..
thats why i cried yesterday..
silly, right?